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Maybe it was only my echo, a version of me that never got to say goodbye to you. It sounds cruel, doesn’t it? Almost like saying I never came back to you at all, as if everything between us had been unreal. But it was never unreal. You and I both know that. Maybe that is why I reached for you again. Not to begin, but because something in me could not settle with the way we ended, or rather, the way we never did. You left without words, without goodbye, and I was left holding a story that had nowhere to land. I think, deep down, I only wanted to close that door properly. But we stayed. Longer than a goodbye should ever take. In this version of reality, I am the one who leaves. The one who walks away without looking back. Maybe I had grown tired of the beast that hope had become in my heart, or maybe I could no longer bear watching you live in fractured realities, trying to hold everyone together, trying to keep everything from falling apart. I saw that, and perhaps selfishly, I decided I should be the one to end us so the life you built could finally breathe again. A thousand little bruises linger quietly in me, small reminders of what we were, each one easing softly as I prepare to let go. And now I understand that sometimes the last act of loving someone is leaving. You said I won, because this time I was the one who left. You said it as if it were revenge. I won’t deny that I resent what you did to us back then. I don’t think I will ever fully unlearn it. But this was never revenge. I just needed my life back, and I needed to return yours to you. You said I’ve won, but to me, winning would have been a life with you, not losing you like this. I have never won. If anything, I am the one who lost everything, because in every version of this world where I choose myself, I still end up losing you, and somehow, I think I was only ever meant to come back so I could finally learn how to leave. M. | a thousand little bruises March 2026


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Love is like a river of tears that will flow whenever you're not here There are days when I see nothing but rain There are days when I just feel so much pain "I miss you" somehow flies right off my lips and so once again I'm left wishing for you to be here There are days when I just miss you so much there are days when I just long for your touch "I love you" somehow flies right off my lips  and so once again I'm left crying for you....

The story continues, in the spaces between what is and what was. Read if it calls to you, skip if not. Thank you for keeping me company. ************************* Part 6 As my eyes lulled to sleep, I heard the night sing a wordless song of farewell to the lost love and to the world that I left behind, a strange realm that exists outside of time, where you and I forever lived under the aligned sun and moon, in the sky adorned with dancing stars. /// Mornings came differently now. The light was sharper, colder, as if reminding me that the world I had known in the garden belonged only to memory. I tried to hold onto it, but life pressed in with its routines, its obligations, and its quiet insistence that I move forward. In my darkest hours, I wished for an ending, my own ending, and for the garden to remain sealed in its realm, forever beyond my reach. I moved to a new city, rented a small apartment, and began to write. Words poured out of me like wind through white clouds, pages filled with longing, fragments of laughter, and sunlight. Friends and my mother checked in often, their concern gentle and persistent. They seemed to wonder what had truly happened, why I would sometimes grow distant in the middle of a conversation, as though some part of me had drifted elsewhere. They never knew of the nights I screamed and cried in my sleep, haunted by what I had lost. I could only smile, brush off their questions, and carry on as if nothing had broken inside me. Still, no matter where I went, no matter how far I wandered, I remembered the garden. I remembered the way the wind played with his hair, the quiet sway of the flowers, the golden evening light that had made everything feel almost sacred. Sometimes, I wondered if it had all been real, or if it was a dream that clung too stubbornly to me to let go. When I could no longer hold the longing, I returned. The city felt distant, the world around me muted, as I passed through the familiar gate. The garden stretched before me, pale and quiet, waiting as if it had always known I would come again. I walked slowly among the flowers, my fingers brushing their petals, my heart aching with the sadness that this could be the last time I would see it, and part of me wished it would disappear to end the pain. Inside the mansion, the gallery revealed itself once more. There, among the familiar paintings and photographs, I found new images of him and her, smiling in scenes that could never belong to me, moments of happiness that had unfolded without me. Each frame whispered the truth I had tried so long to resist. A life that had moved on without me. I stepped back toward the gate. With a slow, deliberate motion, I closed it behind me. When I looked back, the garden had vanished, folded into memory as though it had never been there. And yet, I felt it in the quiet pulse of my chest, in the words I would write, in the night that sang its endless song. The garden was gone, but our story, in some fragile and unbroken way, lived on within me. I turned away from where the garden had been, the wind brushing softly against my face, carrying the faintest memory of petals and sunlight. Life waited beyond the mansion, in the city, in the pages I wrote, in the quiet conversations of friends and my mother who still worried for me. And yet, sometimes at night, when the world grows still and the stars align just so, I feel the pulse of that other place. A world outside of time, a world where he and I had once existed, suspended between sun and moon. I do not know if I will return, or if that world will ever open its gates to me again. But I know this. The story we shared is not finished. Somewhere, in the threads of memory, in the quiet breath of the night, it waits. And I wait with it, knowing that some endings are only the beginning of another chapter. End of Part 6 ©️ M. | September 2025 Part 5 https://ift.tt/fGBwXpQ

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I'm homesick for missing moments that didn’t seem important then, but now echo louder than the present. Maybe I am grieving for routines, laughter, glances, silences that belonged to a chapter no longer being written. M. | May 2025

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